Analysis Shut Down

My heart beats now, so fast and hard that my entire body feels and looks like it's beating.
I understand that I don't want to do this,
That I should hold on, and a part of me will keep holding on,
But that part is being thrown into the dark now.

I'm no longer analyzing, anyone, anymore.
I realize, that I care far too much, more than a person should.

At first, I didn't know how to go about not caring,
But I know how to shut myself off now...
I know how to not care anymore.

And my it's fighting it.
It can't succeed, I won't let it.
I can't let it.

A part of me will always care, it's impossible for me not to,
But I can mask it, I can cage it, I can control it.

Here's to the dying of my heart.

-Rafael