This is who I was, who I am, and who I may become.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

Panic

These anxiety attacks I keep getting are ridiculous.
My heart never seems to stop racing, my stomach never seems to stay settled, my tears never seem to stay in me, my whimpers never seem to quiet.

The smallest thing sets me off,
And when I contain it, I feel worse.

I need rest, but can't seem to get it...
Nothing is soothing anymore it seems.

I hope seeing Ivory tomorrow might help,
In some way, shape, or form..
I need some internal peace

On another note however...

I should be getting my driving permit issued tomorrow after school, which is a big deal. By the time I graduate I should have my license, which opens new doors for me. I'll be able to go out to different places. I'll be able to do more...

We've all got love scarred hearts

1 comment:

  1. Though I don't know you, and most likely never will, I can only wish you the best to overcome your darkness. The first thing to do, is to accept it, then let it go.
    It's not easy, and it will never be. It needs time, and no one can say how long. Keep working; you already took the first step by writing down your painful feelings.

    Take a step towards really talking to Ivory. You can't be replaceble to her, for she spends time with you, doesn't she?
    There's hope, and there's light.
    Don't give in.

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