I can't believe it crossed my mind again, I actually considered using it if I messed up or did something wrong.
I keep thinking that the only way to make things right is to punish myself.
The only way to make anything right is to suffer.
I know I shouldn't have these thoughts, I don't want them, but I can't seem to stop them.
If I can't make someone happy, if I can't hold a meaning in this life, then why am I still here?
It's just more poisoned thoughts...
-Rafael
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